Substitute

Warning: Emo post #2. Beware. read at your own risk.

I hate being a substitute. I almost always am. I'm not the first to come to mind for everything. I'm not that artist or designer in class. I'm not that spontaneous one who can come up with lame jokes all the time. I'm not the one who is good in any specific subject. I'm just not the one.

You know how it's like in movies.... sometimes there's that chosen one, the one who has to fulfil his or her destiny. That person is THE ONE. I am just not that person. And it makes me feel lousy. Sigh... like anyone actually bothers.

But guess what? I think I'm good at being a substitute. People only come to me when they want something done. Otherwise, they treat me like nothing. This does not apply to everyone but you will always meet these kind of people in your lives. No kidding. I always feel that if I can talk to someone freely and not feel uncomfortable, then well, we can connect. If not, well yeah. I guess it's something normal. Oh why am I good at it? I know... but I still smile, nod and say "yes".

Argh I should stop this emo-ing 'cos it's not me. And it hurts. I'm like torturing myself when I don't have to. But I hope you understand that I need to get it all out. Sorry. And thanks so much.